Time and time again I hear about some politician have an affair with someone and then come out to reconcile with the public saying that they “apologize” for their wrong doing – and that’s about as far as they take it.
Time and time again I hear about some athlete use performance enhancing drugs and come out to tell the public that they “regret” their wrong doing – and again, that’s about as far as they take the apology.
There are hundreds and thousands of disagreements that occur everyday between people and one person says something crappy to put another down only to realize that they need to apologize to them and what do they say – “I want to apologize for what happened” – and leave it there. That’s it. The apology is saying that they simply want to apologize – but do they really?
Does saying “I apologize” or “I regret” without including the words “I am sorry” as a follow-up really mean that you are sorry? In my opinion – No. Not at all! It so impersonal. It’s somewhat indirect. It leaves the door slightly open that the wrong doing from you could occur again. It says that you are kinda 50% sorry but not a full 100%.
Saying or including the words “I am sorry” in your apologetic statement, in my opinion, is the most genuine and sincerely way to wrap up any wrong doing you may have done in life that has impacted another. It’s the fastest way to reconcile. It’s the fastest way to forgiveness. It’s the fastest way to peace and happiness.
It’s ok for one country to say “I am sorry” to another country for causing death due to war.
It’s ok for one person to say “I am sorry” to another person if there was some sort of miscommunication.
It’s ok for one family member, regardless of age, to say “I am sorry” to another family member if they did anything to insult them.
It’s silly to think for one second that your ego will be impacted if you say that you are sorry. It’s silly to think that you are pushing yourself below the knees of the other person if you say you are sorry. It’s silly to think that your image will be impacted if you say you are sorry.
Saying “I am sorry” should be included as part of any apologetic statement and be:
- Immediate. Don’t wait days and bleed the relationship.
- Multi-directional. Age, status, job title, familial role, class, wage level, leveraged as an excuse not to say this is inexcusable.
- Sincere. Let it come from the heart.
- Genuine. Don’t make a joke of it.
- Direct. Make the focus of the apology the person.
- Self-accepted. Admit you did something wrong.
- Corrective. Tell them what you will do better through corrective action.
So next time you do something wrong to hurt someone, immediately say “I am sorry” and say it with compassion. If you really want to say you want to apologize then use the words “I am sorry” right after. You will see how quickly people forgive. If this post has enraged you in any way, than I am truly sorry.