“If only there were more hours in the day.”
“The weekend was just too short.”
“With all the kids stuff, I was running around all day and couldn’t find a moment do what I wanted to do.”
“I am very busy these days.”
“If only I could get another hour of sleep”
If you are like me, you have probably heard some flavor of the quotes above from close friends, families and probably even over-hearing conversations taking place at the local bar.
There is a common theme that is the foundation of each of these quotes – but first, I am going to tell you why I feel I am one of the richest men alive.
Being rich to me is not just measured by wealth generated through multiple streams of income. Being rich to me is not just measured by the output of your job through countless hours of work. Being rich to me is not just measured by the ability to purchase a nice big home and car.
There is one thing that trumps the creation of financial wealth and success where I think greater joy can be achieved and that is the ability to create time. In fact, who cares if you are financially rich if you can’t find time for yourself and others to enjoy your wealth. More than money, I feel I have an abundance of time – and the best way I feel this abundance is realizing through my actions that I am a part of time, not something against it. This is what makes me rich.
I am sick if you poor pathetic lame excuse bunch of people who crib and whine about time, when you have all the wealth in the world to buy multiple cars, homes, great vacations, and put your kids through some of the finest schools in the world. Your whining is simply an indication that you haven’t even mastered the art of being satisfied from the results you are producing.
We are living in a world that is defined by the haves and have-nots. Gaps exist today across a variety of areas – for example, financially, digitally, socially, democratically – but there is also a huge chasm these days between those folks who have an abundance of time and those who are time-starved. This is what I am calling the great time divide.
What many don’t see is that the element of time is prevalent in both cases but there is a big difference in terms of how time is perceived and utilized. What many of us don’t realize is that those people who have an abundance of time are actually living life on the qualitative time-scale vs. those who are time-starved living life on a quantitative time-scale.
When you are living life according to the qualitative time scale there is no essence of the minute that passed or the minute that will pass. You are actually the element of time (in this case a minute) living on the timescale in the very present. There is no actual measure of time being calculated or tracked in an event. The event and whatever time you spend on the event will be whatever it is intended to be. There is no set schedule for completion – you seamlessly move from one event to another with no feeling of loss or gain. The only outcome is one of high personal satisfaction.
When you live life by the quantitative time scale, you are living life according to a planned, prescribed schedule of events that you have to participate in. Any slip in the schedule and the quality of the time spent in one event will impact another – hence the domino effect of “not having enough” time to complete an event, not having enough time to sleep, and packing the weekend with one thing after another not giving yourself time to really do anything personal. This is the time-scale that leads to frustration, anxieties and stress as you have a feeling of incompletion, “just not enough”, and low personal satisfaction.
The reason for many of the quotes that we hear about like those mentioned at the top of this post is that these are based on quantitative measures of time where the element of time is just not enough to bring greater joy to the soul. In other words, time management toward greater inward bliss is limited, misunderstood, and seen as something as a chore. This is why we complain that there is just not enough time.
So how do you create time, specifically qualitative time? Here are some ideas.
- You need to master the art of being satisfied with whatever you are doing in the moment without looking back or wishing for something better in the future.
- Realize that time is relative and there is no game of competition to complete anything. Some things will be done faster by others. This is fact you need to live with. As you age you will slow down so why not take things slow now and enjoy it?
- Understand that for some things you can fight to get time back, so substitute time effectively. For example, being stuck in traffic will prevent you from getting from one place to another quickly so there is no point complaining about this. Substitute this time instead toward something to increase personal satisfaction such as listening to audio books or podcasts, or using your hands-free cell phone kit to catch up with friends.
- Remember that time is on your side and no one is forcing your hand to engage in something you don’t want to do. If you don’t want to talk to a friend at the moment they call, just let the phone go to voicemail. If you start to read a book that is uninteresting, just leave it. If cooking something is taking too much time, just order in. Keep in mind that creating personal space is creating time.
- Cautiously befriend the magical formula that the more responsibility you have, the more the feeling of “less time” there will be. Be cautious how much responsibility you want to take. Having kids will take up time. Owning multiple homes will take up time. Working multiple jobs will take up time. Juggling many things will take a lot of time to perfect. Some things will leave you with limited choices. You may have to work multiple jobs to sustain a particular life-style. Be cautious of putting in more time than necessary to compete with others. Sometimes being complacent with whatever you have is the best thing going for you.
- Realize that being too busy is one of the dangers to your emotional and physical well-being. You can’t constantly be doing things or running around from one place to another. You do need a Saturday night alone to spend by yourself. The best plan to fight busyness is learning to say no to some social engagements to free yourself up.